Lessons From a Mixed Up Humming Bird

My wife had recently told me about this humming bird in our yard acting strangely, but as she described it, I couldn’t really picture it in my mind until I saw it.  So the next day, I was sitting on our deck and something caught my eye.  It was a humming bird buzzing around our very large elm tree.  It may not sound too weird until I explain it.  This humming bird was buzzing around the gnarly bark of the elm tree like it was a flower and there was some nectar to be found.  He didn’t seem to find anything there, which I doubted that he would, but he just kept on buzzing around the tree.  He’d buzz and buzz, then rest in one of the low branches for a short while, only to continue this strange attempt at finding some humming bird nourishment from an old tree trunk.  To my mind this was very strange behavior.  This little bird was messed up!

The fact was that less than 20 feet from him was a number of hanging baskets on our deck loaded with nectar bearing blossoms that he could feed from.  Another 20 feet further was a humming bird feeder nearly full of nectar we had provided free for any of our little buzzing bird friends.  Instead of coming to the source of nourishment that was freely provided by God and us, custom made for their high energy needs, this mixed up bird kept buzzing around a tree trunk that offered nothing to him at all, except pure frustration.  It was then that a truth hit me pretty hard, right up side my head.

I had recently been struggling with the disappointment of a big letdown.  I had hoped for a certain position that had come up and I wasn’t chosen for it.  In this situation, I felt very qualified and couldn’t really get a grasp on why someone else was chosen and not me.  The emotions that hit me, hit me very hard and were based on feelings of rejection.  This incident and the resultant feelings seemed to bring back all of the times in my past that I hadn’t been chosen for something going all the way back to grade school.  I was really slammed by this and I couldn’t explain it. 

It was while struggling with these feelings, that I saw this mixed up humming bird hopelessly trying to find nourishment from the trunk of an elm tree.  I wanted to scream at the bird that he was wasting his time, there was nothing there for him, and that if he’d only open his eyes and look around, he would find nourishment custom made for him only feet away.  That’s when it hit me.  I too had been buzzing around an old elm tree trunk trying to get what I thought I needed from it.

What is my old elm trunk?  It is the approval and acceptance of humans.  My disappointment and all of the emotions that came with it were based on my need to be recognized by humans.  A lot of us have this same problem.  I grew up a performer.  I realized early on that this was the way I got positive attention.  I got good grades.  I was the “good boy”.  I performed musically because I had the talent and it gave me positive feedback.  I have even tried performing religiously to get positive feedback from men and from God (God doesn’t care about performance, but old habits die hard).  When someone lives for approval by man, then that which can be perceived as disapproval, like not being recognized or chosen for something, brings with it the flip side of the emotional coin—the extreme opposite of the elation one feels when they are recognized and “chosen”.  This perceived disapproval can be a crushing blow.

This is what I was feeling, and it took God speaking through a mixed up tiny humming bird to show me how totally insane it was for me to try to get  my worth and spiritual nourishment from the approval of men.  In that very moment I realized that in the realm of spiritual things I looked just as stupid and messed up as the humming bird, and I heard God telling me to open my eyes and look around and find the true spiritual nourishment that is custom made just for me which I can only get from him.

Jesus taught about getting acknowledgement from men in Matthew 6.  His bottom line is, if you do things to be recognized by men, that recognition is the only reward you get.  That reward, given by men is nothing but a gnarly old tree trunk compared to the sweet nectar God has for us.

I wonder if the Pharisees realized that to God they looked as stupid as a humming bird buzzing around the trunk of an old elm tree.  I know it finally hit me.

What Does It Take To Get God To Act?

My wife and I were discussing a life situation we were struggling with lately and a common question came up.  It was, to paraphrase it in general, “How do we know we’re doing the right things to get God to act in our lives?”  To put it another way, “How do we know we’re in God’s will?” or again, “am I doing the right things in relationship to God?”  This question takes many forms but it all boils down to the same thing.  When we desire God’s direct work in our life situations, or seek a specific answer to prayer, what does it take to bring that about?  Is there something I’m not doing that He wants me to do?  Is there something I’m doing that is preventing His work in my life.  These last two questions are not wrong to ask ourselves and God.  There may actually be something that is preventing God’s work.  If there is, God does not hide that from us, He usually lets us know pretty clearly when we ask.  It is up to us to be faithful to act on these convictions.  But, what if there is no word of conviction one way or another from God and it seems He is still distant, or our desires and even needs seem unmet and our prayers unanswered?

When this question came up, I smuggling and half jokingly said there is an answer to the bottom line here, and I pointed to Ecclesiastes 12:13

      Now all has been heard;
    here is the conclusion of the matter:
    Fear God and keep his commandments,
    for this is the duty of all mankind.

To paraphrase this in New Testament language, “the bottom line is:  Love God and do His will.”

The “Preacher”, the writer of Ecclesiastes, which we take to be Solomon, had spent the whole book going over his search for ultimate meaning in life.  He chronicles all of the things he has pursued with the conclusion that all but this one thing is vanity and chasing the wind.  Jesus reflected this bottom line in His teachings and His life.

Our discussion went on from there because of the common question, “How do I know I am in God’s will?” or “How do I know I’m doing everything in God’s will?”  It was then that my mind went back to the Mount Carmel incident between Elijah’s God and Baal (I Kings 18).  As the story goes, a challenge had been posed to prove who the one true God was.  The challenge was to see which of the gods represented would send fire down from heaven to light an offering on the top of the mountain.  Elijah, being very confident, gave the prophets of Baal the home field advantage.  He let them go first and let them have first pick of the bulls to be offered.  So they set up their altar with the offering on it and started praying, then begging.  That didn’t do it, so they started dancing and crying louder.  That didn’t even do it, so they started cutting themselves with swords and spears until blood was freely flowing.  They did this for hours.  In fact they did this starting in the morning, through noon, until evening with no results. 

When I look at the cutting themselves part, I am reminded of a song by the Rolling Stones, “I Know It’s Only Rock and (But I Like It)”.  This song is a slam at all of the stage theatrics that were going on in pop/rock music at the time.  Some of the lines are, “If I could stick my pen in my heart
and spill it all over the stage,” and “If I could stick a knife in my heart, suicide on the stage.”  Then the question is posed, “Would it satisfy you?”

The question, what does it take to satisfy God?  The prophets of Baal served a false god.  Baal was an idol made by man out of their own imagination—an idol which supposedly had power, but had to be appeased with any number of hoops to jump through to get him to work.  With such an idol there was a progression of antics that the follower had to go through to gain favor and produce action by this god.  As in the Mount Carmel incident, it started with prayer.  On that day, prayer obviously wasn’t enough, so they went on to more fervent prayer and shouting.  Not good enough today, so dancing was in order.  Dancing usually did it, but obviously Baal was not so easily pleased today.  That left only the final resort which meant cutting themselves.  From the narrative it can be conjectured that the cutting started small, but we see that it progressed until blood was freely flowing from the wounds.  I am sure the prophets of Baal were asking themselves and their god, what does it take to get you to do this one thing?

Elijah had a little fun with them while this was all going on.  He taunted them, “maybe he can’t hear you,” or “maybe he’s just busy,” “maybe he’s deep in thought, or asleep.”  Elijah actually went so far as to say, “maybe he’s in the bathroom.”  Sure this sounds funny, but it shows us a great contrast between a god conceived by man and the one true God of the universe.  The psalmist tells us many times that our God has none of these anthropomorphic qualities or limitations.

After their failed efforts, we know that Elijah built the altar and even flooded it with water.  He then prayed once and the fire fell from heaven, burning up the sacrifice, the wood and even the stones of the altar, the water and even the dirt around it.

I look at this story and have to remember that my God, our God is not an idol who is fickle, or so caught up in himself that he would toy with us humans.  He doesn’t have the human failings, quirks, shallowness, or frailties that an idol like Baal was seen to have.  Our God is all powerful.  Our God is ultimately and constantly attentive.  Our God is love.  We don’t have to bargain with Him, dicker with Him, manipulate Him, and the only way we can appease Him is to love Him and trustingly follow Him.

So what can we say about the times when it seems God is far away, or He has reserved or withheld His activity and working in our lives.  God didn’t always answer Elijah’s prayers immediately.  In fact, right after the altar incident on Mount Carmel, Elijah prayed for rain.  This whole incident had come at the culmination of a three year draught which started when Elijah had prayed that it stop raining because of the sins of Ahab and Jezebel and the nation following after Baal.  God, before this showdown had promised to give rain again, so after the great victory, Elijah faithfully prayed for rain.  He prayed once and sent his servant to look for signs of rain.  The servant brought back a disappointing report, "nothing.  Not even one tiny cloud."  The was repeated a total of six times with the same disappointing results.  It was not until the seventh time (I won’t go into numerology at this time) that Elijah prayed and his servant brought back the report that there was a tiny cloud, “as small as a man’s hand, rising from the sea.”  Wow, seven times of praying for something that God had already promised, and the result was a tiny cloud no bigger than a man’s hand?

Sometimes it works like the altar incident, but sometimes it works like the cloud incident.  What we don’t see is Elijah begging, wailing, dancing and cutting himself.  We see him simply continuing to pray in faith.  I believe he would have continued praying in faith, trusting God to work as He had said.  Why didn’t it come on the first prayer?  Was God hard of hearing, or in deep thought, or involved in something else at the time?  Was Elijah not doing something right, or not doing enough?  No.  We don’t know why it didn’t happen immediately this time.  What we know is that faithful prayer of a believer does bring about the work of a God who is the one true God and is faithful and always at work in our lives even when we don’t see it. 

What about the timing, though?  I can't say much, but God's timing, though often undiscerned by us is usually the right timing (tongue in cheek, of course).  Refer to the seven times of praying for support in this area.  I know, I said I wouldn't go into the numerology, but I couldn't help myself.

I know it’s only faith and prayer, but God likes it.

I Don't Need Rest! Do I?

I got a chance to rest recently.  I needed it.  I have been feeling like I’m teetering on the edge of burn out.  I could tell because any time I would run into a situation that I could normally handle with determination and minimal stress, I would, instead react with panic, fear, and emotional duress.  What brought it about was a combination of a number of things, many totally out of my control, but some I had put on myself or accepted not knowing the pressure they would add to me and my emotional/physical being.  They included extra responsibilities in different areas that I saw as good and had accepted for myself, some were even ministry opportunities.  Some were personal projects stacked one upon the other, that I truly wanted to do, however not realizing the stress and pressure that always accompany such endeavors.  Anyway, I had come to realize that I really needed some rest.

Getting rest was not that simple, however.  I had used up my available time off from work, due to slow business and taking care of my Father.  I didn’t think I could afford unpaid time off due to my wife still being unemployed.  So, there I was, feeling really in need of rest, but stuck in not seeing a way I could accomplish it… then I got it.  During the week of July 4^th, work was so slow that I had absolutely nothing to do.  The boss had hinted at us taking time off during the holiday week, but again, I had no available vacation, but I volunteered to take it off anyway.  I did so for two reasons; one, as I said, I needed it, and two, I had been impressed by an Old Testament story of a guy who got rest and replenishment when he didn’t expect it or even know he needed it.

I Kings 19

 ¹Now Ahab told Jezebel everything Elijah had done and how he had killed all the prophets with the sword. ² So Jezebel sent a messenger to Elijah to say, “May the gods deal with me, be it ever so severely, if by this time tomorrow I do not make your life like that of one of them.”

³ Elijah was afraid and ran for his life. When he came to Beersheba in Judah, he left his servant there, ⁴ while he himself went a day’s journey into the wilderness. He came to a broom bush, sat down under it and prayed that he might die. “I have had enough, Lord,” he said. “Take my life; I am no better than my ancestors.” ⁵ Then he lay down under the bush and fell asleep.

All at once an angel touched him and said, “Get up and eat.” ⁶ He looked around, and there by his head was some bread baked over hot coals, and a jar of water. He ate and drank and then lay down again.

⁷ The angel of the Lord came back a second time and touched him and said, “Get up and eat, for the journey is too much for you.” ⁸ So he got up and ate and drank. Strengthened by that food, he traveled forty days and forty nights until he reached Horeb, the mountain of God. ⁹ There he went into a cave and spent the night.

I have read this account many times.  I’m sure I’ve preached on it more than once.  It’s funny how we look at Elijah in this account.  We wonder how “did he end up here?”  He had just come from one of the greatest showings of God’s power to mankind; the fire from heaven burning up the sacrifice, the wood, the water, and even the stones of the altar in the face of the failing prophets of Baal.  Instead of riding high on the glory of that great spiritual victory, we see Elijah running for his life.  The man who so strongly believed in God’s power somehow lost his nerve at the threats of Jezebel.  The faith and trust that brought the fire down from heaven in the presence of an adversarial mob was now, not strong enough to stand up to one angry queen. 

I will deal with the whys and the wherefores of this in another writing, but for now let’s just look at the account and how it unfolds.  For whatever reason, one of God’s most faithful finds himself beat down, bedraggled, and in the dumps.  Man, was he in the dumps.  He ran for his life and was trying to commit suicide.  Some may not realize it, but Elijah was trying to commit the equivalent of what I would call Hebrew suicide.  He ran to the wilderness, left his servant and went a full day’s journey deeper into the wilderness, whined a lot and laid down to die.  He didn’t take his own life per se, but put himself in a situation where his life would be drained from him with no food, no water, and no one to save him.  As he did this he cried a prayer of despair which basically put the responsibility of his actions on the Lord.

If Elijah had died, would it have been the work of the Lord as he had asked?  “Oh, well, God let me die so it must be on His hands.”  Duh!  Elijah had put himself into a situation akin to a modern day person taking a load of pills and asking the Lord to take his life.  God, in this situation, really had nothing to do with his hope for death.  If I were God, which I definitely am not, I would be saying, “Don’t you put this on me.  You’re the one trying to kill yourself.”  Of course, I am not God and it’s probably a good thing.  God acts differently than I would in this case.

What does God do?  Does God get all up in his face and say something like, “And I thought you were a man of God.”  Or, “Get up you loser and get back to work.”  No, God realizes that Elijah was in no shape physically, emotionally, or spiritually to even face and/or hear from God at this time.  So, God does not judge him or deride him.  God does not even speak a Word to him.  God does something that seems out of character with the false god that many of us were raised with, God gives him rest, sustenance, and recovery.  God let him sleep and not willing to let him starve, gave him food.  I see this as God giving him recovery.

It seems obvious from the account that this is what Elijah needed.  He had spent much of his ministry butting heads with King Ahab and especially the one who wore the pants in that family, Queen Jezebel.  When a person is in a state of constant struggle and fight, it wears on them.  Elijah was definitely a hero of faith or he wouldn’t have continued to the point of the big clash on Mount Carmel, but Elijah wasn’t immune to exhaustion, physically, emotionally, or spiritually.  He shows that as he begs for release through death in the wilderness.  God knew his child and knew he needed recovery first and he gave it to him.

After recovery, Elijah needed more from God.  Recovery only brings us back to normal.  God knew Elijah needed more, so God gave him more.  God gave him more rest and more food because God was not done with Elijah or the ministry He would bring to His world through Elijah.  The Angel of the Lord who brought the food also brought a word, “Get up and eat, for the journey is too much for you.” 

Yes, the journey is too much for us sometimes.  The journey gets too much many times when we are trying to make the journey in our own strength or even not relying fully on God’s power and strength.  (I will deal with this in another writing in which I plan to deal with the I’s and You’s of the story.  It’s interesting to look at.)  The story goes that Elijah did get up and eat and drink and with the rest and the food given him, he made a forty day journey to meet the Lord, deliver his complaint, here God’s word, and have his call renewed and redefined. 

None of this was possible in his previous state.  There are times when we are so worn out and beat down and bedraggled by what we have been going through that we cannot serve God any more.  We get to a point to where all we can see is the forces and the obstacles against us.  We get to the point that we can’t even recognize God and we cannot hear a word from God.  At these times we too often despair.  God knows that and God knows what we need.  We need rest.  We need sustenance.  We need recovery.  We need building up.  We need strength.  And God is there to give it to His child.

I would advise any reader to hear this story from this light and ask yourself, am I worn out?  Am I beat down?  Am I running on empty?  Am I like Elijah and need rest, sustenance, recovery, building back up and strength?  Let God, the loving Father give it to you.  Accept it from Him.  You may be of little use to Him until you do.

The Power of Storms

“Lord, if it’s you,” Peter replied, “tell me to come to you on the water.”

29 “Come,” he said. (Matt 14:28-29)

 

We all know how this turned out. Peter started walking on the water, but the waves and the storm got more of his attention than Jesus and he started to sink. He finally cried out to Jesus who was still standing firm on the water and Jesus saved him with a bit of a rebuke.

“Little faith;” Yes I admit it. It’s not natural to walk on the water. It’s hard not to see the waves. Peter, a fisherman, knew what the waves could do. He had faced them many times in his life. While in the boat, he and the others had been straining at the oars against the waves. They had been tossed around in a sea worthy boat by the waves. He did not yet know, however, what Jesus could do and the power that was in him. He did not yet know that this same power was available to him in faith.

I understand Peter. I want to walk on the waves. I want to have victory over earthly reality, but I also know what the waves can do.

At this time in my life, my wife and I are going through a bit of a storm. She is out of work and finding a job has been quite difficult and frustrating. And with this, the waves have started building. The waves of financial stress… the waves of future security doubts… the waves that we have dealt with before. You see, we know these waves. We’ve seen them before. We’ve struggled against them and been tossed around by these waves before. You might say we have faith in what the waves can do and it scares us, or at least it’s starting to scare me. Yes, I have to admit I am, like Peter, at this point in my life, of little faith. I hate it. I really do. I want to keep my eyes on Jesus and walk calmly and victoriously on the storm. If it weren’t for those darned waves and what I know they can do.

It’s not that I am not convinced of God’s power and ability. It could very well be that I am not fully convinced of God’s love and providence in my life yet. My view of God is distorted I know, though I am trying to let Him heal that view. God will provide, but how much of the storm will I have to endure before He does? How much sea water will I have to swallow before I am lifted up? From spiritual insight into this story, I will only have to swallow as much as I want to. I will only have to swallow sea water as long as I struggle in my own power and acknowledge the power of the waves instead of my Lord.

Peter got a rebuke from Jesus, but in all of these rebukes that Jesus gave to the disciples, I don’t see a nasty derision. Jesus did not reflect that type of attitude anywhere else in His life and ministry. Jesus never let his followers fail without teaching and growing them. I see everything that Jesus did as a teaching moment. In another storm record, Jesus asked, “Where is your faith?”

For many of us, like Peter and the disciples, our faith is too often in what we see and know. It took them quite a while to “know” Jesus and the power of God in Him. Through the incident of this storm, Peter got a chance to know this truth more. Growing is hard. Waves are truly scary. My Lord has power over all of the storms of life. I don’t really like the taste of sea water.

Lord help me trade my acknowledgement of the power of the storms for acknowledgement of Your power in my life.

KNEE DEEP IN FISH STINK

(or we might call this, The Anatomy of a Call) 

(You may see by the date of this post that it has taken me some time to come up with this follow up, but it finally came.)

As I said at the end of the post on the anatomy of a miracle, I am sure that my job is a miraculous work of God.  In fact, it has gotten even more miraculous since that post with my being hired full time at a higher level and higher pay than I could dare to dream.  That falls very much in line with God’s miracles that He works in people’s lives.  When Peter did what Jesus instructed him to do, even though it made no sense, he not only got a “catch” of fish (we realize in this story that Jesus was understating the forecasted outcome greatly), but the nets filled so much they couldn’t pull them in.  In fact, upon calling their partners out to help them, the nets were bursting and the “catch” was so enormous, it was swamping both boats.  Now that is a catch of fish. 

Though we, as humans are greatly talented at explaining away the miraculous work of God, He does go out of His way to make sure that those for whom it is meant definitely understand the work.  Peter understood.  The Scripture says that he and all the others were astounded, but Peter reacted in a very special way.  He fell at Jesus’ knees and said, “Go away from me, Lord; I am a sinful man.”  When Peter saw what had happened, sheer and totally drained humility was his response.  We know from later accounts that Peter is not fully aware of who Jesus is at this point, but he is aware enough to know that Jesus is of God and that in His presence, Peter’s own short comings trumpet loudly.  In this realization, Peter confesses his sinfulness upon his knees, presumably in a pile of fish.  Most if not all Biblical accounts of an honest man coming into a realization that he is in the presence of the Holiness and Power of God relates that man confessing his inability to measure up.  “Woe is me,” cried Isaiah.  Falling upon one’s face is common, and fearing death in the presence of The Holy is also a frequent response. 

Peter, at this moment realized as best he could at this point in time whom he was faced with.  He realized his own inadequacies in relationship to this Holiness and Power.  He responds to this in the most common way known in Biblical accounts.  He begs Jesus to go away from his sinfulness.  As stated in the earlier post, God doesn’t do miracles for miracle’s sake.  He doesn’t do them just to prove He’s God.  He usually has a deeper purpose for his miraculous work, and many times, it is in relation to calling a person to a special task or ministry.  Moses saw a burning bush.  Peter got a pile of fish.

As Peter begged Jesus to depart from him, giving Him what seem to be acceptable reasons for the Son of God to depart, having nothing more to do with this sinful man, Jesus did the opposite.  He did not depart, at least not until he gave Peter a call. 

Jesus’ first response is the same thing that God has been saying to men in Peter’s position throughout history, “Do not be afraid.”  In fact I am writing this less than two weeks before Christmas, and I am reminded of the Angel’s words, “Fear not, for behold I bring you good tidings of great joy!”  Man’s right response to the presence of God is contrition.  A usual response is fear.  God says to not be afraid.  A contrite man has nothing to fear from God.  A confessing man has nothing to fear from God.  God’s response to these men is always, “Fear not,” and “I love you.”  Jesus answered Peter with “Do not be afraid,” then he gave him a combination invitation/prophecy.  In Matthew’s and Mark’s accounts, Jesus is recorded to have said, “follow me and I will make you fishers’ of men.”  Luke’s account just says, “from now on you will catch men.”  The difference in wording doesn’t change the call or the prophecy.  The call is implied even in Luke’s account, and we know that Peter left the fish behind and followed Jesus.  Peter left that whole big, unbelievable catch behind and followed Jesus—that catch that would make him a legend among fishermen—that catch that would pay all of his bills and possibly go toward a start on retirement.  He left it behind and followed Jesus right then and there. 

So what’s going on here?  What are we to gather from this story?  I believe it has to do with identity.  Peter was a fisherman.  Jesus said from now on, you will be a fisher of men.  Being a fisherman was Peter’s worldly identity.  It produced worldly results.  It produced a living which is not bad at all in and of itself.  Don’t get me wrong, work and vocation, providing a living and shelter are not wrong in God’s eyes.  What is wrong in God’s eyes is when we find our identity in these things.  Being a fisherman produced recognition, especially after having hauled in such a big catch.  It produced camaraderie.  For Peter it was in the form of partners, James, John and Zebedee, as well as membership in a group made up of a common trade, fishermen.  Just think of the comradeship of the group on the sea shore or in the local inn as they regaled each other with their stories of catches and trials at sea. It wasn’t God telling Peter that this wasn’t enough, however.  Obviously for Peter, however, all of this was not enough.  It seems that for Peter, this identity was missing something.  Even with the most astounding catch known to man at that time, Peter must have felt an emptiness.  Somehow, the great catch of fish had turned into one big pile of fish stink for Peter.  That’s what happens to every honest human when they find their self worth and identity in the temporal.  Peter was ready to find true identity and meaning in his life.  He was ready to shed the hollow and/or shallow identity that is found in worldly pursuits and take hold of the identity found in following Jesus. 

The problem for all who have not heard and taken up that call to truly “follow” Jesus is that we, as Peter find our identity in temporal or worldly things.  We find our identity in parenting, in our relationships, in our jobs, in our hobbies, in the groups and clubs we belong to, even our religious groups and churches, etc.  These are all temporal and worldly.  

The call from Jesus is “come follow Me, and get your identity from Me.”  That’s what we see in Jesus’ call to Peter.  Jesus was saying, “follow me and I will make you who you truly were meant to be.”  The call from Jesus is telling us that whatever we see as our identity in this world is only a shadow of what God, the Father created us to be.  I’ve heard sermons preached on this passage with the bottom line being that we are all called to be fishers of men.  I don’t buy that now.  I am not a fisherman by nature.  By nature, I am a fixer, a builder and a rebuilder of things.  I have an old Harley Davidson that I bought as a very derelict basket case and spent four years gathering parts and putting it back together.  Later, I bought another basket case.  This time it was a 1952 Ford Pickup.  It was in as bad or worse shape than the Harley—really nothing more than a big pile of parts, but now it runs and I have fun with it.  I also build things from scratch, like musical instruments and tube type guitar amplifiers.  I seem to have a need to always be doing something like that.  My vocational career at this time is that of designing and building machines for the manufacturing world.  If someone were to look at me, they would say that this is the core of my identity.  I would tend to agree, but I have, of late, found that identity to be a bit shallow.  I still find myself unsatisfied deep down.  One accomplishment after another still doesn’t do it.  It is in this quandary that Jesus speaks and says, “Follow me and I will make you a fixer, a builder and a rebuilder of men.” 

Lately my wife, Gayle and I have been going through some deeper learning and growing with a special group in our Christian lives.  The idea of getting one’s identity from Christ has been a very strong concept in our teachings.  At a time or two, I had to admit that I was nervous, even scared to press on, because I was honestly afraid of losing the identity that I had come to know as me.  Who would I be without it?  Others may judge me for this, but I am being honest here.  It was, however, while I was once again contemplating this fish story that I saw the light. 

Jesus didn’t say to Peter, follow me and I will make you a fixer of men, or anything else of men.  Jesus wasn’t going to make Peter into something he wasn’t.  Jesus was going to take the dim, shadowy identity that Peter found in this world and transform it, clarify it, and perfect it into his true Kingdom identity.  I now see that this is what Jesus wants to do with me.  That’s what he wants to do for all of us, and his call is, “follow Me, and let Me take that big pile of fish stink that you have accepted as a substitute identity in this world and transform it into what God, the Father always meant it to be.”  I think I understand now and am ready to truly follow and find my identity in Christ.

The Question of The Deep Water

My great fishing story continues.

(This is written more than six months later. I did not stop considering the fishing story, and things did not stop happening in my life. I have just begun to have time and/or inclination to start writing about them again.)

As the story goes in Luke’s account of the great catch of fish (Luke 5:1-11), when Jesus had finished teaching from the boat, he told Peter to take the boat out into the deep water and let down his nets. As was pointed out in the teaching I heard on this passage, the word used for nets was the word that referred to nets used for night fishing, which would stand to reason since they were on shore in the daylight hours cleaning them after use. Also when Peter answered Jesus instructions, he states that they had worked hard at fishing all night, but had come up empty.

Now we can assume one of a couple of things from this. One, it’s possible that Jesus, being a carpenter, didn’t know one fishing net from another and just used the word that came to mind. Or, it may be that somehow he did know what he was talking about and used the proper word for the nets that were available at the time. Whatever the truth about this, the important point is that they did have their night nets with them and that is what they were instructed to use, during the daytime. Myself, being a non-net fisherman, don’t have a clue what the difference was between a day net and a night net in first century Palestine. I do know the difference between a floating plug and a diving plug in modern day bass fishing, as well as the difference between a dry fly and a wet fly in trout fishing. When it comes to net fishing, I even know the difference between a gill net and a seine net, but that’s as far as it goes. The fact remains that it was daytime and a non-fisherman was instructing them to use the lesser effective equipment for the time of day, after they had given it all they had at the best time with the right equipment.

Jesus also made one more fishing faux pas that was not covered in the sermon I heard, but one that I believe was truly seen as poor advice by the professional fishermen present. Jesus told them to push out into deep water. The reason I mention this is that, being a person who has at times pursued the art of fishing quite seriously, I know that deep water is seldom where one finds fish, whether while fishing with a net or with a line. If they are in deep water, it is due to the need for a certain temperature, or that is where the food is, and it is very hard to make nets useful in very deep water. Fish are usually found around what is called structure. Structure is usually an object, or underwater geography that is pronounced and will provide some sort of shelter, food, or movement boundary that fish seem to desire.

I sail my boat around the Apostle Islands in Lake Superior. There are a number of commercial fisheries there which set nets, and a sailor has to be able to see the markings and avoid them. These nets are set around certain types of shoreline and off of points that extend into the water. Fish tend to hang around these areas or cruise them looking for food. Fishing in the deep water is done with down riggers and totally different equipment.

(Note: In studying about the deep water in study materials, all they do is analogize the “deep water” into what it means for Christian Ministry today. In fact, I see too many times that this whole story is used as an analogy for Christian Ministry with total disregard for what it may be speaking to the individual Christian in their personal life. I find that very sad.)

So to restate the scenario, not only had Jesus told them to fish during the day after a night’s worth of fruitless efforts, he told them to use the wrong nets, and told them to fish in the wrong area. Sheesh what a carpenter!

What can we say about the deep water in this story and what it has to say about us and our lives? In the story, Peter doesn’t come right our and say it, but I can’t help but think that he was thinking very loud that, “You just don’t catch fish with a net in deep water!” I took improvisational comedic acting training at one time and one of my favorite things we did was called a rant. It is exactly what it sounds like; you pick a topic and “go off” on it. I loved the rant and seemed to do well with it. I still have a lot of fun with it today. I can hear the rant going on in Peter’s mind at this moment.

“Deep water! The carpenter wants me to fish in deep water. Hey, would somebody tell this “great fisherman” that you don’t catch fish with a net in deep water. Or maybe it’s just me. Maybe I’m the one who’s been wrong all these years. I’ve only fed my family for fifteen years from the fish I’ve caught. I’ve only bought a house and clothed my family on fish I’ve caught. I’ve even done well enough to take my mother-in-law in. And I’ve done all of that by not fishing where the fish aren’t. In deep water!”

But this word had not come from just any old carpenter. It had come from Jesus. Peter wasn’t totally sure of who he was at this time, but he knew he was someone and something special. He had already heard about and personally seen the miraculous workings of this man.

One other thing shows up in this narrative, and that is the confidence that Jesus had when he gave the instruction. He didn’t give it as a weak suggestion, “maybe, if you went out there and let down your nets, you might catch something.” No, Jesus was definite and direct with his language. “Put out into the deep water and let down your night nets for a catch.” The word “catch” here has a connotation of fullness. It definitely meant much more than a few. So they did it, and of course the catch was truly a catch.

I continue to dwell on this story because of how it has pertained to me in my life recently. I related earlier how the opportunity came for the job. How I got the call and almost didn’t answer it, how it was for a place that had passed me over several times. And how it all happened so fast it made my head spin. I wrote that earlier part before I realized the catch was not yet complete. You see, I went there as a temporary contract employee. That is how you get your foot in the door of a lot of companies in my line of work. After being there eight weeks, they came to me and told me that the workload had diminished and they would have to let me go in a couple of weeks. I was truly disappointed, but feeling that God had truly provided the job, I trusted Him to handle the situation (This may sound like I’m a warrior of faith. Not hardly, but I do have my moments). One week later, they came to me and said they had enough work to keep me on for a number of months. That was good. Again I gave God the glory and honor for this one.

Then something truly amazing happened. I was told to put out into the real deep water for a catch. I thought I had already done the deep-water thing, but there was deeper water to be fished. Two job postings for permanent employment came up in my area of expertise at this company. Before I could act, one of them, the one that I felt more qualified for was filled. It was, by the way, the lesser of the two jobs. I was bummed, but I was encouraged by others to apply for the other one. To remind anyone who may have stuck with me through all of this, this company is the top in the area for what I do. It is in the top three in the nation and top five or ten in the world. I was totally blown away by the fact that I was actually working there, and now the opportunity of being a full time permanent employee with a higher classification and salary than I could ever believe possible was dangling in front of me. “I’ll never get it,” was my feeling. “Why should I even try?” I said to myself. Remember, I had been beat down by the outside employment world for a number of years. But, remembering this story about the catch of fish, about putting out into the deep water, about using the obviously wrong nets for the situation, I decided to put out into the deep water.

Yes, I put out into the deep water, let down the wrong (not fully qualified in my sight) net, and I landed the great catch of the job. I got the Job! After the three companies going out of business from under me, I got the job. The job. A little bit of listening to God and taking a step in obedience, if not fully convinced faith can open the doors that produce miracle upon miracle. Praise God!

So why is it that God will call us to do irrational things at irrational times only to produce unbelievably miraculous results upon our acting in faith? I can think of two reasons right off the bat. One, there are times when He wants to bless us and/or teach us something, and He wants us to realize that it is totally and completely from Him. Secondly, He wants to show us his power and/or His love, depending on the situation.

Peter could look back and realize that even the bad night of fishing was only set up in preparation for this miracle. I can look back and see that the struggles I had been having with my employment over the past few years was only set up for my miracle. Some times we need the frustration of the trying times to prepare us for the miraculous work of God.

The Anatomy of a Miracle

I said at the end of the lengthy first post about this story, that me getting a new job was a miracle from God. That takes me back to a question posed to one of my professors in Seminary. He was teaching a New Testament class and the question of miracles came up. Along with this came up the idea that has been tossed around in many circles that miracles don’t happen today. The people that hold this belief believe that the miraculous was meant for a certain time in history, possibly due to specific reasons, but not for today. My teacher, to his credit, did not hold to this belief. He stated that he honestly believed miracles do happen in modern times. So one of the class members piped up with the question, “have you ever had a miracle happen to you?”

The teacher answered with a definite “yes. I’ve had many miracles happen in my life,” he continued.

When asked to tell about them he gave an interesting answer. He said that they were miracles to him, but they may not seem like miracles to us. When pushed for an explanation, he went on to explain that the miracles that happened to him happened at a specific time in answer to a specific need or situation in his life, therefore, though they may not remotely resemble miracles to an outsider, they were definitely miraculous works of God to him. Obviously I have never forgotten these words, and the concept has helped me to see God’s miraculous work much more than I may have without this insight.


Timing; a vital ingredient in a miracle
I heard something once that said in effect, “the difference between a miracle and an everyday occurrence is a question of timing.” Though I don’t believe that is completely definitive, it does have a lot of merit. To go with that idea, one could bring up that oft-repeated scientific question concerning sound, “if a tree falls in the woods and there is no one there to hear it, does it make a sound?” To combine this concept with a discussion on the miraculous works of God, “if the Red Sea parts and there are no Israelites fleeing from the Egyptians, is there a miracle?” To continue, “if there is a big catch of fish and it is not after a long night of fruitless effort, and it does not come in relation to the direction of a carpenter/teacher, is it a miracle?” And, one more time, “if there is a job offer, and it is not accompanied by a strong seeking of God, obedient action, and great obstacles, is it a miracle?” The answer to each of these questions is a qualified “yes.” All of these situations could, in fact, be the miraculous working of God, but without the timing and a specific met need or question, along with singled out witnesses, they are not identified and accepted as miracles in the lives of those concerned.

As I have mentioned, I went to Seminary in preparation to become a minister. In my seminary studies I was continually made aware of those who would try to explain that which has been accepted as miraculous in the Bible with natural occurring phenomena. Many of these surrounded the escape and wanderings of the Children of Israel. The seeming inability of humans to accept the miraculous work of God in their lives and those of others is astonishing to me in many ways. One of the “explanations” that I remember quite clearly is the feeding of the Israelites with quail. The story goes that they were getting tired of manna. What a bunch of whiners. It’s not like they ate hamburger helper everyday for a month, or lived on ramin noodles for a whole semester. It’s not like they had to force down generic mac and cheese and cheap hot dogs because it was the end of the month. They were living on a wonderful and miraculous food provided daily by God to meet their needs. But they were tired of it, and they began to whine. They wanted meat to eat. So God promised them meat, and in the evening quail came and covered the ground of their camp and they were able to gather them up and eat meat for a whole month. The thing that sticks in my mind about this “miracle” is that there are those who have tried to explain the miraculous away by saying that this coincided with a natural migration of quails which after flying across a great expanse of water collapse exhausted on the shore. Yeah? So, what if this is the case? The Israelites are still there in need and the Word of God had said he would provide in a very specific way for their need. And then the quail arrive. So, isn’t that a miracle?

This has brought up a second very vital ingredient in a miracle. Miracles are generally preceded by an unmistakable Word or instruction from God. There are some few miracles in the Bible that do not record a direct Word or instruction as preceding a miraculous work of God, however it is explained and/or understood that the miracle was brought about by a strong conviction that God would work in that situation of need. The woman who merely touched the hem of Jesus’ garment and received healing is an example. The Centurion who knew that all Jesus had to do was say the word and his servant would be healed (Matthew account) is another. Many times, and I will say more times than not, a miracle is preceded by an unmistakable Word from God. This Word usually contains two aspects. The first is usually recorded as God saying what he is going to do. God is usually pretty clear when He directly intervenes in human life and need, and the first thing that usually comes out of His mouth other than “fear not” or “settle down (paraphrased)” is an explanation of what he is going to do. The second thing that comes out to the waiting human is an instruction or direction

This brings us to the third essential ingredient of a miracle. That ingredient is an “action of faith,” based on the Word and/or instruction from God. The action of faith for the Israelites as they crossed the Red Sea, was first for Moses to stretch out his hands and staff over the sea. That action of faith caused the sea to part. The second action of faith was for the Israelites to cross the sea with water walled up on either side. I honestly believe that, though the Egyptian army was pursuing them, crossing that sea took faith on the part of each individual and on the people as a whole. Another parting of the waters came as they finally approached the Promised Land and stood on the banks of the River Jordan. God called the priests to take a step of faith. They, while carrying the Arc of the Covenant were to step into the rushing waters of the swollen river. This was no easy feat if you have ever tried to set foot into a rushing current. As they did what they were told, the waters parted and they and the people crossed into the Promised Land. Peter followed Jesus’ instructions and received a miraculous catch of fish. I answered the phone.

Another thing that comes to mind is this. While the miraculous works promised tend to exceed the bounds of believability as we humans know it, the actions required to obtain said miracles seldom fit into our realms of reason, either. To put it a different way, we as humans usually respond, “You’re going to do what? And you want me to do what?”

“You’re going to deliver us from the overtaking Egyptian army? And you want me to walk across that sea bed with walls of water on either side?” “You’re going to part the swollen, rushing waters of the Jordan? And you want me to wade on in before you part it?” “You’re going to give us a great victory over Jericho? And you want us to merely march around the city for seven days and play horns and shout?” “You’re going to give me a great catch of fish? And you want me to go out into the deep water, after a fruitless night of fishing, and let down the wrong nets?” “You’re going to heal me of my long lasting illness? And all I have to do is touch the hem of Jesus’ robe?” “You’re going to give me new direction in my life and vocation? And you want me to swallow my pride and answer the call from the company that embarrassed me, and hasn’t ever given me a real opportunity, for a position that I have already tried for many times with no results?” “It just doesn’t make sense!”

Finding Sense in the Senseless
The sense is found in the result. That result, however is never the mind-boggling miraculous action itself. The miraculous action is only a tool used by God. The result is what happens in God’s people when they listen to the instruction, carry out the action required, see the miraculous, and take it to heart. The miraculous is never the end. It is always a means. It is a means with which God teaches His child—His people . . . a means with which he grows His people in faith . . . a means with which he brings His people closer to Him.

Peter’s reaction was not that of a true fisherman. I dare say that my misguided minister friend may not have been able to handle this great catch. He, along with most of the rest of us would find a way to “humbly” make himself look good. A lot of people in Peter’s place would stand up and say, “Wow, I never realized that if you fish during the daylight hours, in deep water, and with nighttime nets, you would catch this many fish.” We all might be inclined to choose to overlook the miraculous and the lesson involved and decide that this is the way we will fish from now on. In fact, I can see some one in Peter’s shoes writing a book about it entitled Deep Water Daytime Fishing With Nighttime Nets. He could develop a web-based business and do speaking engagements to share his new found secret. He may even patent the process and charge for the rights to use it, and if lucky, he would get his own show or at least an Infomercial promoting his newfound fishing method. Another unbelievable reaction may be what my wife just brought up, and that would be deciding that this is how the righteous, true believer fishes. Only the pagans fish the old way. God has shown me the righteous new way to fish, now.

Luckily Peter didn’t respond with a common human response. He didn’t fix his eyes on the physical result of the miraculous; he fixed his eyes on The Lord and his relationship to that Lord. Peter fell on his knees in that wondrous pile of fish and said, “Depart from me, for I am a sinful man.” It was out of this that Jesus was able to complete a call to a new direction in Peter’s life.

So, yes, my getting this new job was definitely a miracle from God. I am now in the process of seeking out the meaning of this miracle in my life. The first and always the basic teaching is that God does dearly love His children and is intimately involved in their lives. That is a biggy. There is more to this miracle, however, and I am seeking out the meaning to me.